Today I am still a vegetarian.

I have been having the strangest conversations with myself lately; mostly inside my head, but sometimes I can’t help but say some of it out loud. They go something like this:

“I’m probably going to crave a burger again next month, just like I have done each month around my period.”

“You honestly think you are going to CRAVE beef again? You don’t need it you know.”

“I know I don’t NEED it, but I’ll probably want it.”

“What if you had to track down a cow yourself? What if you had to track it down, pounce on it and kill it yourself. Would you still want it then?”

“Why would I ever need to do that? I can just go buy ground beef that is already packaged up for me. Or even better, I can just go buy a burger at a restaurant.”

“You still don’t need it, and I’m not going to let you eat one next month.”

“We’ll see.”

When I eat meat I don’t feel well for the next couple of days afterwards. It is as if someone has taken a huge syringe and sucked all the life out of me. I just don’t want to have that lack of vitality feeling anymore and so it is my biggest goal right now to get past these meat (specifically beef) cravings once a month. Part of it is the physical cravings, but I know that so much of it is an emotional issue for me.

“Breath is the bridge which connects life to consciousness, which unites your body to your thoughts.” — Thich Nhat Hanh

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